Thursday, September 29, 2022

Quiz Time

PPPS (Littleton)—Sometimes we like to give our readers a little fun quiz to test whether they are paying attention to the fake news. Here's one to start with. For best effect, play the Sesame Street song "One of these things is not like the others" in the background as you contemplate your answer.

Sunday, September 11, 2022

Rethinking Biden's Speech

PPPS (Littleton)—In our previous blog post, our staff may have come off as enthusiastically endorsing President Biden's healing "Soul of America" speech in front of Independence Hall in Philadelphia. 

Upon reflection, and after reading several polls on the public reaction to the speech, along with hundreds of readers' comments, most of which we had to delete, we asked our Religion Editor, Pious Pete, to engage in a bit of soul searching on the topic. 

Here was his conclusion in the form of a revised meme.

Please note that PPPS does not engage in religious interpretations of political events and that suggested interpretations from readers, including numerous references to dictators (specifically Musolini and Hitler), tyrants, demons, fascism, terrorism, thugs, hair sniffers, socialists, communists, Stasi, brown shirts, FBI and Satan, played no role in Pious Pete's re-interpretation of the speech. In fact, it is a long-standing PPPS policy to never includes such controversial terms in any of our posts. 

Furthermore, Pious Pete would like to reiterate that he has no personal knowledge of the content of "Benito" Biden's soul and would never presume to do so. 

However, Pious Pete has previously offered an opinion on the state of political discourse in America which might help in the interpretation of the Bidens speech. Pundit Pete: Pious Pete Opines on State of Political Discourse

Here is the meme from that 2017 blog post.

Friday, September 2, 2022

Summarizing Biden's Healing Address

PPPS (Philadelphia)—President Biden gave a rousing speech yesterday evening in front of Independence Hall in Philadelphia. His speech was so comforting and healing of the hurting soul of our nation that we asked our graphic artist, Pixel Pete, to create a moving tribute to our Dear Leader with one simple meme.

Thursday, July 28, 2022

Biden's Economic Response to a Recession

PPPS (Washington, DC)—We asked our graphic artist, Pixel Pete, to present the Biden Administration's complex economic policies and response to today's release of the 2nd Quarter leading economic indicators in a manner more easily understood by our Low Information Readers.

Tuesday, July 5, 2022

What's Up With the New Pride Flag?

PPPS (San Francisco)—During June, officially designated as LBGTQ (plus) month, or Pride Month in America, a new flag began to appear across the fruited plain. In addition to new colors added to the traditional rainbow, the flag also included some phrases which were puzzling.

Perhaps some of our readers can explain.

Wednesday, March 23, 2022

Significant Thoughts by Kamala

PPPS (Littlteon)—One of the little appreciated attributes of our globe-trotting, problem-solving Vice President is her ability to inject poetry and philosophy into topics of importance to the American people. 

We, at the Pundit Pete Press Service certainly appreciate how Vice President Harris has elevated the national much so that we are putting together a recurring series documenting her most elegant ramblings. We call it Significant Thoughts by Kamala.

Here is the first installment.

Disclaimer: Any resemblance to actual thoughts or quotes from VP Harris is purely coincidental and not intended for a satirical or less than honorable purpose. If so accused, PPPS will deny it.

Saturday, February 26, 2022

Stories from CPAC 2022

PPPS (Orlando)--We've assigned several of our staff Petes to roam the halls of CPAC 2022 in Orlando and interview attendees and celebrities alike. Here are a few.

Stories from @cpac 2022.

Sitting in the Press Area for CPAC, the power went out for two rows of tables and the journalists started to panic.

Pundit Pete (aka Practical Pete) went out into hallway and found Foreman Mike Furey, a regular CPAC attendee and builder of border walls. He came in and immediately fixed our electrical problem.

Now if we can set him to work on our election integrity problem. THANKS MIKE!

Tuesday, February 15, 2022

Commentary on Canada from a Progressive

PPPS (Boulder)—With our neighbor to the north shut down by traitorist trucker terrorists, and the Canadian Prime Minister finally taking appropriate action, we were surprised to see this commentary from our own staff member, Progressive Pete. 

Could the winds of change be blowing south?

Disclaimer: The Pundit Pete Press Service, it's staff and affiliates, do not condone violent horn blowing as a legitimate form of expression.

Thursday, January 27, 2022

Could Pete Be Offered Supreme Court Appointment?

PPPS (Washington, DC)—With the "Unofficial" announcement that Supreme Court Justice Breyer will retire, speculation as to a replacement has been running rampant around this town.

PPPS has an exclusive scoop that our own Pundit Pete is high on the list for the appointment. We have obtained a copy of the application submitted by Pete, which our White House sources tell us has already risen to the top of the stack.

President Joe Biden
White House
                                  Re: Upcoming Supreme Court Vacancy

Hey Joe -

I have an unblemished court record (if you ignore that incident back in college) and I self-identify as a BLACK FEMALE.

Plus, since Covid started, I've gotten a lot of experience working in a robe.

Come on man, give me a call!

—Your friend, Soon-to-be-Justice, Pundit Pete

PPPS will keep you updated as this story develops. Pete has already met with several leaders in the Senate to determine how he would rule on key issues before the Court.

Monday, January 3, 2022

Pundit Pete's 2022 Predictions

PPPS (Littleton)—With 2021 finally in the rearview mirror, our esteemed Editor-In-Chief, Pundit Pete, has issued his Predictions for 2022. 

1. Illegals Will Sue Cartels in 2022

With a generous cash settlement courtesy of U.S. taxpayers apparently off the table, look for illegal immigrants and their Leftist lawyers to re-aim their mistreatment, separation and trauma lawsuits at the Mexican Cartels in 2022. 

Pundit Pete is so confident in the success of this endeavor that he has directed our own corporate attorney Pleader Pete to get in on the action (and a generous cut of the resulting cash settlements). We will update our readers on the lawsuit status, just as soon as we hear back from Pleader Pete, who is making initial inquiries south of the border (he's only been missing for a few days now).

2. Democrats Will Win Big in the 2022 Midterms

All of the major polling outfits, and most of the TV pundits are now predicting a major win for the GOP in the 2022 midterm elections. But those same major polling outfits and TV pundits have been notoriously wrong in their predictions over the past few election cycles. 

Here at the Pundit Pete Press Service, we have undertaken a different polling and prediction approach, seeking out the underlying trends in politics that others passed over. Relying on a unique and proprietary polling method in which we are able to sample deceased voters, PPPS has identified a major underground shift in voter attitudes going into 2022. 

H/T to Suzanne Hamner for article and photo. 
In 2020, the extremely large dead voter block voted almost exclusively for Trump, allowing him to come remarkably close to winning the presidential election. However, one year into the Biden administration, this voting block appears to have turned over. 

With references to President Biden's shuffles on stage as akin to a "dead man walking", the resent Democrat Build Back Better legislation described as "dead in the water", Biden's policy decision making process described as "brain dead", with both the Democrats' and Biden's approval ratings in a "death spiral", dead voters have taken note.

"The Dems are just like us. Dead. So, they've got my vote", blushed one deceased Chicago voter, who proudly displayed a Grover Cleveland pin commemorating the first election he ever voted in. "In fact, I'm gonna vote Democrat in several states this year." he added.

Based on these trends, Pundit Pete is now predicting a filibuster and veto-proof Congress. With such an overwhelming majority, Democrats will be able to pass Democracy-Restoring, Covid- Crushing, and Climate-Saving legislation at Biden's bidding starting in 2023.

Just remember, you heard it here first. 
P.S. - don't forget Pete's previously successful prediction in the 2012 election.

Bonus - Pete's Personal Resolutions for 2022 We Can All Follow

MORE PREDICTIONS TO COME - That last one really took the life out of Pete, and he needs a little time to recover.