Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Protest Groups to Reimburse County for Costs of Black Friday Bridge to Nowhere Event

PPPS (Littleton) Prompted by our in-depth investigation into the Bridge to Nowhere protest on Black Friday, the groups responsible have agreed to reimburse Jefferson County for law enforcement costs associated with their radical activities.
Our PPPS investigation indicates that the Jefferson County Sheriff's Office incurred significant costs related to dispatcher time, mileage, and 5 minutes of investigative work for one Sheriff's Deputy to respond to 911 calls reporting free speech activities north of the Wadsworth and Bowles intersection.

After a lengthy internal audit in response to our Freedom of Information Act request, Jefferson County today issued a statement that a total of $17.62 was expended in connection with the Black Friday event. By our accounting, that brings the total cost of the Bridge to Nowhere, including both county and federal government expenditures, to $3,000,018 (rounded to the nearest $1).

Responding to questions from a PPPS reporter, a spokesman for the Jefferson County Sheriff's Office admitted that no lives were lost due to the diversion of dispatcher and deputy time away from other law enforcement duties.

PPPS reporter Progressive Pete, with the Jefferson County cost estimate in hand, confronted one of the purported leaders of the protest, a man identified only as Citizen P, at his suburban home.

When shown the bill for his radical activities, Citizen P responded, "Wow, that's a lot less than we thought it would be. We discussed reimbursement to the county before we even held our protest, and took up a collection at our Bridge to Nowhere Tea Party group meeting last night. With promised matching funds from the For Cryin' Out Loud Foundation, I'm pretty sure we've already got enough to cover the $17.62."

A mysterious women who would only give her name as Citizen C, then came out of the home and said "Please make sure you put in your story something about that nice Sheriff's Deputy. He was very helpful, explained to us about our free speech rights and wished us a safe protest. He also said something about a giant paper weight, but I think he must have meant 'paper work.' I only wish I'd written down his name or badge number, you know, so we could get him a commendation or something."

PPPS will follow up to see if the groups actually follow through on their reimbursement promise. Check back for updates.

In an unrelated story, the Denver Post reported yesterday that the state and local law enforcement efforts associated with the Occupy Denver protest will have cost taxpayers an extra $782,689.

Trackbacks & Related Stories: 
Tea Party Not Dead - Rumor of Tea Party Protest In Colorado 
Tea Party Finds Use for $3 Million Bridge to Nowhere
Protesters Take a Stance on Bridge to Nowhere 
A Bridge Too Useless (great story by Columbine Courier)

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Citizen Pete Sends Us Something Priceless

PPPS (Littleton) Our loyal reader and occasional contributor, Citizen Pete, sent this comment on the Tea Party Bridge to Nowhere protest recently covered by the Pundit Pete Press Service.

Dear Editors at the Pundit Pete Press Service -

I just have this to say about that stupid Black Friday protest at that bridge.

Butcher paper, poster board and paint for sign making.  

$ 75

Pedestrian Bridge to Nowhere.

$ 3 Million

Giant billboard for posting Tea Party messages.


Your friend,
Citizen Pete

P.S. Non union labor was used in sign making and posting efforts.


Tea Party Finds Use for $3 Million Bridge to Nowhere

PPPS (Littleton) A local group of Tea Party activists finally found a use for the $3 Million Pedestrian Bridge to Nowhere near Littleton, Colorado. The group convened for a Random Act of Illumination to shine light on government waste and encourage election of conservatives to prevent future projects like this.

The message read:
The local 9News station was there to report on the event.

PPPS was the first to report rumors of the planned protest and will be filling updates on the story. Refer to our November 22 story for more details.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Tea Party Not Dead - Rumor of Tea Party Protest In Colorado

PPPS (Littleton) Despite pronouncements in the media and political circles that the Tea Party is officially dead, having been replaced in the hearts and minds of middle America by the Occupy Movement, PPPS has identified rumors of an upcoming Tea Party protest in Colorado. To verify these rumors, we sent our crack reporter team to the remote suburb of Littleton, Colorado to investigate. Our team includes noted expert on the Tea Party Movement, Progressive Pete, and our now homeless Occupy Wall Street reporter, Protester Pete. Here is their report so far:

Upon arriving in Littleton, we settled into a secret subdivision home location near the community center at Southwest Plaza mall. Although at first glance, the community seemed passive, we uncovered an underlying level of dissatisfaction centered around a recently built pedestrian bridge.

It seems that some in the community are questioning the need for the bridge, which we found provides an aesthetically pleasing connection between two large, empty parking areas. A few local residents have also questioned the miniscule $3 million cost of the project, a bargain by most public works project standards, particularly when federal (80%) instead of local funds were mostly used.

Although most  people we interviewed knew neither the reason for the bridge or the actual cost, they all expressed suspicion and some inexplicable anger, apparently stirred up by recent coverage by the local 9News TV station, the Denver Post, and political blog sites.

We emphasize inexplicable, because we could not identify a single local resident who had actually walked across the bridge, or even knew of, or had seen, someone who had.

During the course of our investigation, we identified rumors of a potential protest at the bridge by Tea Party activists, including an obscure reference on a web site.

Although details are uncertain, it appears that the protest may take place at 10 AM on Friday, November 25, with parking at either side of the bridge.

We have also partially identified one of the instigators, a shadowy figure named Patriot P_____. Others implicated may include a Persnickety P., address unknown.

Check back for details as this story unfolds.
H/T for lead from Citizen P.

Friday, November 18, 2011

Happy Birthday to VP Joe Biden

PPPS (Littlteton) Citizen Pete, one of our loyal readers, shares his birthday note to Vice President Joe Biden after Pete received an email from the Obama/Biden campaign to add his message to a card for Joe. Joe's Birthday is this next Sunday. Pete wrote:

Dear Vice President Biden, Sir:

Happy Birthday! Thanks for being such a wonderful spokesman for the Progressive Movement. What are you going to do for your retirement party in January, 2013?

Your friend,
Citizen Pete

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Breaking: Housing Starts Up. Occupy Wall Street Evictions Credited

Occupy Denver couple review new home plans
PPPS (New York & Washington) Housing statistics released this morning by the U.S. Census Bureau indicate an unexpected 17% rise in new home permits and home starts for October.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Occupy Denver Leader Quits to Join the One Percent

PPPS (Denver) BREAKING NEWS........
Kelsey Whipple photo from Westword
In a stunning setback for the Occupy movement, PPPS today confirms that Shelby, the newly elected leader of Occupy Denver has quit the movement to join the so-called "1 percent."

Questions were initially raised  last Friday when Shelby was missing from Occupy Denver's protest of BlogCon11, a conference of radical right-wing bloggers taking place at a swank Denver hotel. Even the bloggers were wondering.

VF Daily/Conde Naste Digital Archive
Now our trio of investigative reporters, Progressive Pete, Pedestrian Pete and Protester Pete, have solved the mystery.  Shelby has left the movement to move in with a member of the 1%, the very target of the Occupy Denver protests.

Although we have yet to firmly identify the culprit, we can confirm that Shelby's new friend is an Afghan and that Shelby's new home is a plush penthouse in Denver's exclusive Spire tower.

Photo credits: 
Photo of Shelby by Kelsey Whipple. See Kelsey's great article in Westword.
Photo of Afghan is from article in Vanity Fair's blog VF Daily about dogs of the 1%.
Trackback: Right Wing and Moderate Groups Contest Occupation of Denver Hotel


Saturday, November 12, 2011

Right Wing and Moderate Groups Contest Occupation of Denver Hotel

PPPS (Denver) In a dramatic confrontation yesterday, two groups, BlogCon11, representing right wing bloggers, and Occupy Denver, a moderate group representing the other 99 percent of citizens, clashed briefly over the occupation of the downtown Denver Crowne Plaza Hotel. Our own PPPS reporter, Progressive Pete,  had infiltrated BlogCon11 as part of his undercover assignment to report on the radical Tea Party Movement. Pete's report:

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Protester Pete Files First Report from Occupy Wall Street

PPPS (New York via cell phone) This is the first in a series of in-depth reports about the Occupy Wall Street Movement filed by our on-the-scene reporter Protester Pete.

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Traveler Jake Offers Nutrition Advice

PPPS (Baltimore) Sometimes while traveling, you meet an extraordinary individual who, in your brief encounter, offers up the kind of wisdom that you'll want to remember forever.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Cain Sexual Harassment Scandal Embarrassing - For Media

PPPS (Denver) It is normally our policy not to comment on or criticise other media organizations. However, there are instances that are so outrageous, and behavior that is so unprofessional, as to be embarrassing even to the journalism profession.