Practical Pete Helps With An Election Question

PPPS (Litltleton)—During election time we are often inundated with a lot of questions from readers about the election process and important voting issues. So we've asked our Advice Columnist, Practical Pete to respond.


ASK Pete:   Advice for some of life's most puzzling dilemmas.

Dear Practical Pete:

We had a big wind blow through here the other night. 

Besides the section of fence that blew down, we had a whole bunch of our neighbors' political signs blow into our yard.

Usually, every election year, when it's time to vote, I just look out the window and mark my ballot based on the signs my wife posts in the front yard.

But this year, I'm really confused. 

What should I do?  - Puzzled Pete, Chinook, MT

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Dear Puzzled Pete:

That's really a pretty puzzling situation you're in there Pete, trying to figure out how to vote. My advice is this:

First go get your wife's ballot. She probably won't need it. A lot of women aren't voting in the election this year - casualties in the War On Women, I guess.

Next, just start pick'n up political signs in your front yard and mark your ballot and then your wife's ballot, one-at-a -time, according to what each sign says. 

If, when you're done filling out the ballots, you've still got some signs left over, why you can go down to the county clerk's office and get some more ballots. Just use the names of some Dearly Departed Kinfolk (may they rest in peace) to get as many ballots as you think you need.

That should do the trick, and no more confusion. Then dump all the signs in a neighbor's yard and refer them to my column.

Happy to help. — Practical Pete