Thursday, September 20, 2018

BREAKING: Anonymous Letter Surfaces About Hillary Clinton

PPPS (Washington, DC)—We are in receipt of a shocking letter involving Hillary Clinton from an
anonymous source who we suspect may be a male, IT professional.

PPPS is unable to release the full letter, or any information which might identify the sender. This brief excerpt, however, hints at a major scandal involving the former Secretary of State and Democrat presidential candidate.

As any good citizen would do, our CEO, Pundit Pete, has turned the letter over to FBI. The FBI responded to us with this brief, partially redacted explanation.
"The FBI does not investigate allegations of an anonymous nature which may involve Hillary Clinton, Barrack Obama, or other previously investigated individu         als, and does not accept unsolicited documents from anonymous sources who may have previously been granted immunity."
With that response, we believe the case to be closed.


UNRELATED ANONYMOUS LETTER DEPARTMENT CORRESPONDENCE: PPPS has also received an anonymous letter which we believe to be from a different IT professional and involving a member of Congress. A portion of the letter reads as follows:

"Debbie Wasserman Schultz used me, fired me, then secretly kept me on the payroll for months."

Wednesday, September 5, 2018

Kavanaugh Hearing - Day One

PPPS (Washington, DC)—With day one of the Judge Kavanaugh hearing in the bag, our own Pundit Pete arrived at this conclusion:

Also, after observing the frequent interruptions and demonstrations intended to derail the proceeding, we concur with Senator Ted Cruz, who summed it all up quite succinctly, from a political perspective:

Monday, August 6, 2018

NYT Named Racist Rag of Record

PPPS (New York)—With the hiring of new editorial board member Sarah Jeong for her insightful views on race, the New York Times has earned another esteemed title as the Racist Rag of Record.

Thursday, June 14, 2018

BREAKING: Leaks Indicate IG Report Conclusion Pre-Written Almost Two Years Ago

PPPS (Washington, DC)—Several news organizations are reporting that based upon leaks from unnamed government sources, the main conclusion in the Justice Department Inspector General's report on the Hillary Clinton email matter, closely matches, nearly word for word, a document previously written almost two years ago and published by PPPS.

PPPS has obtained a copy of the concluding statement in the IG Report, set to be released later today, and compared it to this conclusion which first appeared on July 7, 2016. The two statements are nearly identical.

Thursday, May 17, 2018

Pixel Pete Helps GOP

PPPS (Littlteon)—In the interest of fairness, having already helped the Democrats develop some campaign strategies for 2018, our own graphic artist, Pixel Pete, decided to offer his talents to the Republicans as well.

Here is what he came up with as a generic campaign theme:

Note: PPPS does not endorse, support or campaign for candidates of any political party.

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Radical Literature Targets Students

PPPS (Berkeley, CA)—Our undercover student investigator, Protester Pete, has uncovered a dangerous and radical document being circulated among students at colleges and high schools around the country. Pete was able to intercept this copy before it could be used to radicalize an unsuspecting and vulnerable student.

PPPS is currently investigating the individual or organization responsible.

Wednesday, March 21, 2018

T-Shirt Message All the Rage On College Campus'

PPPS (Boulder)—There is a surprising turn in the protest culture happening on college campus' across the nation as a radical t-shirt design is being worn with alarming frequency.

Some sources suspect that College Republicans may be to blame. Others think it may be part of a well-funded attempt by remnants of the Tea Party Movement to indoctrinate the younger generation.

If you share, please credit: Pixel Pete & Citizen Caryn
Reports of free T-shirts being distributed by an older white gentleman on street corners near universities have not been confirmed.

NOTE: Any resemblance to a recent design by our own Pixel Pete using a slogan contributed by Citizen Caryn, may be purely coincidental.

Sunday, February 25, 2018

Should DEMS Retool Their Message?

PPPS (Littleton)—With the recent reversal in the national generic preference polls showing that the Democrats may be loosing their edge in voter approval, many in the media are asking the question: Should the Democrats retool their message for the 2018 elections?

Some pundits are even suggesting that the Democrats should shift their emphasis from RESISTANCE and all-out, 24/7 Trump hatred, to memes offering practical and proactive solutions to our nation's problems.

Credit: Pixel Pete and a generous grant from an unnamed Russian oligarch.
In that vein, we asked our graphic artist, Pixel Pete, to come up with some new, more positive messaging to help out our friends on the Left.

Here is his first suggestion.

Also, in light of the recent huge fundraising discrepancy between the GOP and the DNC, we asked Pixel Pete to address this issue as well.

Credit: Pixel Pete and a generous grant from the RNC.
Here is his practical suggestion in the form of a fundraising appeal to American workers, who constitute the bulk of the the Democratic Party base.

Friday, February 9, 2018

Military Parades Are Really Cool

PPPS (Peoyangchang, South Korea)—We understand that there has been a bit of an uproar over President Trump's desire to have a military parade in our nation's capitol.

So we asked our North Korea correspondent, Pyongyang Pete, who has considerable experience observing military parades, to pause from his duties reporting on the North Korean Women's Olympic Hockey Team, and offer some perspective.

Friday, February 2, 2018

FBI Releases Memo - Comey & Clinton Exonerated

PPPS (Washington, DC)—In a surprising twist, an unnamed source at the FBI has released a memo from the Hillary Clinton email investigation which appears to exonerate both former FBI Director James Comey and former Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton of any wrongdoing in the "Matter".

The document, dubbed the "The Memo That Explains Everything" was an attachment to the following early morning news release posted on the official FBI web site:

Key Document in Hillary Clinton Email Investigation Matter Attached
FBI Headquarters, Washington, DC, February 2, 2018, 05:30 Hours – At the direction of eseginonongonon, Chief FBI ajdfaofinna-gnnoinso, the Federal Bureau of Investigations makes available the attached document titled The Memo That Explains Everything. This document is responsive to information requests by Members of the U.S. Congress, the Media and Other Interested Parties.
This document was key to the decision by former Director James Comey, in consultation with addfem oonsldfn, sdofsde dooo, and odsoduu ddodoee, to not recommend criminal prosecution in the Hillary Clinton email Matter. The attached document was recently declassified after lengthy review and deliberation by members of the FBI and DOJ Secret Society Oversight Committee.  
With the release of this document, all relevant and responsive material has been provided and the Matter is considered CLOSED.
Attachment: Memo
For More information or clarification, Contact:
Adfdfo odoeono, Assistant Deputy FBI Special Communications Directo
Some members of Extreme Right-Wing News Media (Hannity and others) are cynically speculating that the release of the subject memo is intended as a distraction from the forthcoming release of the "FISA Memo" by the House Intelligence Committee.

PPPS offers no opinion on the Matter. We report the news. We don't interpret it. That is up to our readers.

Saturday, January 27, 2018

PPPS Hires Fake News Director


In order to better compete with other major news organizations in the current news market, the Pundit Pete Press Service announced today the creation of a new staff position,  DIRECTOR OF FAKE NEWS.
Phony Pete, Fake News Director

After an exhaustive search and interviews with many, many talented and qualified journalists, PPPS is proud to announce the hiring of Phony Pete as our new Director of Fake News. 

Phony Pete hails from another news organization (which we shall not name) and claims to have been a Fake News Award winning  White House Correspondent, although for this type of position, resume credentials are always considered suspect.

Pete, did however, present numerous, verifiable, news story examples which clearly qualified as fake news - so many, in fact, that we gave up on reading them after the first 200 or so. Most, it turned out, had a common theme, criticism of the current president, a fake news meme that we can certainly get on board with, and a key element in maintaining market share.

Phony Pete, upon hearing of his selection for the Fake News Director position, was quoted as saying,
"I am so thrilled to accept this job with the Pundit Pete Press Service, the premier fake news organization in America. People don't realize the constant pressures involved with pretending to deliver "objective" news content. At PPPS, I will have the freedom to direct staff in genuine fake news reporting on a daily basis. I couldn't be happier."

Note:  Any image resemblance to a certain well-known journalist is purely coincidental and should be considered as "fake news".

Thursday, January 25, 2018

Some of FBI Text Messages Found

PPPS (Littleton)—Based upon a hunch, PPPS staff searched our own Editor-in-Chief, Pundit Pete's personal cell phone. We now believe we may have located at least some of the missing text messages from the five-month gap in the FBI records. As Pundit Pete finally admitted....

Monday, January 22, 2018

Picking Stock Winners In A Swamp-Draining Environment

PPPS (New York)—We asked our financial adviser, Prognosticator Pete, for some advise on picking stocks during the current unrest in government and "draining the swamp" environment taking hold in our nation's capitol. Here was his advice on a winning stock pick.

Note: PPPS does not endorse stock picks and is not responsible for any losses so incurred.

Sunday, January 21, 2018

An Important Milestone - One Year Later

PPPS (Littleton, CO)—Today marks the one-year anniversary of an important milestone in our nation's history. Some liken it to the point in time when the "oceans of misery began to recede". Others have said Armageddon was avoided on that day, and that the evidence is there, if people would only just "add up all the crumbs."

As reported by PPPS a year ago, Congress declared this day in 2017 to be a national holiday. 

We think that today should be celebrated each and every year going forward.

So, citizens of America, drop what you are doing for a minute, stand tall as proud Americans, and let out a collective "Yippee".

Saturday, January 20, 2018

Thoughts on Today's Women's March

PPPPS (Wasthington, DC)

BREAKING NEWS: #SchumerShutdown Begins

PPPS (Washington, DC)—After negotiations to continue funding federal deficit spending broke down in the Senate, the Democrats' shutdown of the federal government began at midnight this morning.

Because the Trump administration refuses to weaponize what is being referred to as the #SchumerShutdown, most Americans won't notice a thing. Our staff has summed it up nicely.

There are a few others, however who see the #SchumerShutdown in a more serious light - take this tweet for example:

We at PPPS, however, find it hard to believe that the much-admired Senate Minority Leader Charles Schumer (of #SchumerShutdown fame) of New York, and other Democrats in Congress, would EVER put any political maneuver or partisan politics above the interests of their fellow American citizens, the government services they may receive, the people who defend our nation, or the booming economy which is lifting millions out of poverty.

That thought is just too implausible to believe, the above tweet message not withstanding.


Historical Notes: PPPPS also covered a previous government shutdown in October, 2013 caused by evil Republicans, one Senator Ted Cruz in particular, in an attempt to defund the highly successful Affordable Care Act (sometimes referred to as Obamacare) before it could benefit millions and millions of Amercicans and transform our healthcare system for the better.

Following are some PPPS articles from that time:

Our own loyal reader, Citizen Pete, offered up an amendment in hopes of resolving the impasse. 

Citizen Offers Obamacare Amendment to Resolve Government Shutdown Crisis - October 4, 2013

Click to enlarge & view

Citizen Pete also offered an opinion, after his first attempt stop the shutdown failed.

End of the Obama Shutdown - A Citizen's Reflection and Plan of Action - October 17, 2013

And as a followup to the characterization that President Obama may have weaponized that October shutdown at the expense of our veterans, PPPS published this, along with a poignant photograph.

Will President Obama Be Able to Mend Fences With Veterans? - May 30, 2014

Friday, January 12, 2018

Advice for Democrats in 2018

PPPS (Washington, DC)—In light of the failure of Armageddon to ensue following the passage of the GOP Tax Reform Bill, our Editor-in-Chief, Pundit Pete, had this advise for Democrats in 2018.

Sunday, December 31, 2017

Best of 2017 From the Pundit Pete Press Service

PPPS (Littleton)—Once again, it is time to wrap the eventful year of 2017 with a review of some of the best posts from the Pundit Pete Press Service, as determined by our readers and staff.

Biggest Scoop of National Importance by PPPS in 2017 - This story, posted on March 5, 2017, about apparent Russian collusion among Trump associates, may yet lead to the impeachment of President Donald Trump.

BREAKING: Suspicious Russian Connections Among Trump Supporters at Denver Rally


Most Effective Post from a Loyal Reader - This message, received from the mysterious Patriot Pete and directed to members of the U.S. Senate, very likely resulted in the successful appointment of a U.S. Supreme Court Justice.
April 4, 2017 - Patriot Pete Sends Message to Senate on Gorsuch Nomination

Another Effective Post - This graphic, posted at PPPS on June 24, 2017, was instrumental in influencing the debate among Democrats.

The proof: Nancy is still there.


Least Effective Post from 2017 - It was hoped that this graphic, posted on Thanksgiving, 2017, would result in healing for our nation and Al Franken's continued service to  the people of Minnesota. 

Alas, it was not to be. 

However, in postponing his official resignation until January 2, 2018, Senator Franken was able to molest the American taxpayers by cashing in on a couple more paid holidays, and to ensure his celebrity status by being the butt of jokes for at least one day in 2018.


Best Suggestion for a New National Holiday Posted on January 10, 2017


Best Actual Interview (Non-Satire Category) by a PPPS Staff Member - Our CEO, Pundit Pete, got to interview Katie Pavlich at the Western Conservative Summit, July 22, 2007.


Best Article by an Actual Journalist (Non-Satire Category) - Citizen Caryn, loyal reader and friend to more Petes than she would like to admit, has actually worked as a professional journalist and wrote this article for PPPS.


Most Re-Tweeted Graphic in 2017 @Pundit_Pete(from The Hillary Collection)


Best Fake News Most Likely to Turn Out to Be True - This post, direct from the fevered imagination of Pundit Pete, may be closer to the truth than anything reported in 2017.

Clinton-Lynch Tarmac Conversation Revealed - September 18, 2017


Most Prophetic Post from 2016, Proven True in 2017 This commentary, originally posted on July 7, 2016, was revealed in 2017 to have been remarkably on-the-money.                                                                                                                                                                          Our Conclusion from the Clinton Email Case                                                                                                                  Scary, huh? 


Interesting STATS: PPPS Is Serving the World With Important News



Tuesday, December 5, 2017

BREAKING NEWS: Rep. Conyers Resigns

PPPS (Washington, DC)—Our sources in the nation's capitol bring you this earth-shattering, breaking news about a member of Congress.

Updates to follow.
UPDATE: In a supreme act of unselfishness, Representative Conyers recommended that his son be appointed to replace him to represent the good people of Detroit. Now, that is the way you secure your legacy as an Icon.

Swamp levels in the DC area appear to be falling. Global Warming may be the cause.

Thursday, November 23, 2017

Happy Thanksgiving From All of the Petes

PPPS (Littleton)—We at the Pundit Pete Press Service have much to be thankful for, and at the top of that list are God, country and our many loyal readers. And so we wish all a Happy Thanksgiving, and offer up this simple advice and encouragement for discussion around the dinner table in celebration of the freedoms that make America great.